Surviving the Dark Months

 Surviving the Dark Months

It is Friday the 426th of January and it is at least minus 10 degrees. I have been questioning the existence of my toes for about three days as I can no longer feel them. I have also wondered about the viability of a side hustle involving spa days with “genuine and authentic Somerset Mud baths” as the main attraction. 

I have no right to complain – there are warriors out there who have been fighting the good fight on all fronts, every morning and every evening whilst I sit in my full livery ivory tower able to avoid the worst of it and let some other poor soul take on the icy darkness. 

But still- I am still a horse rider and I am looking for a bright side with every daffodil I see growing in the hedgerows. 

 

Let’s weigh up the pros and cons of winter…

BAD

It’s dark- pretty much constantly – I am developing a somewhat obsessive relationship with my head torch.  to frost bite…   If it’s not cold- It’s WET- your fields are no longer having a hydration issue- neither is the inside of your riding hat which is pretty moist (ick) from Halloween until pretty much Easter. Your clothes, shoes, jodhpurs- wet. Your horses’ boots, tack and numnahs WET. And for some reason even though both you and your horse own enough “waterproof” clothing to restock Mountain Warehouse three times over you still can’t find anything dry enough for either of you to wear – so you and your equine bestie spend the best part of three months being just a little damp.    If it isn’t cold or wet- it is WINDY. I’m not talking a casual breeze here- in fact just last week I’m fairly sure I saw Dorothy’s House fly past my stable door about three times…wind in itself isn’t an issue but for…   Horses in the winter- well…they are assholes. FACT.    You are tired. All. The. Time. Because it is dark- all. The. Time.    You spend 99% of your day wondering what rug to put on and the other 1% having an existential crisis that the one they are wearing is the wrong one.    You are hungry – probably because one of your NY resolutions was to go on a diet. Or just because food is reliable and carbs are amazing.    You are skint- horses have a sixth sense for this. And because horses are assholes ( see above) this is the time they pull off their shoes, develop a respiratory issue, go lame, rip their rugs, cut themselves, become allergic to their bedding, develop ulcers and break things. This is also the time your car decides to break and your dog ends up having to have emergency vet treatment because the dopey little git decided to eat a bra or something.

GOOD

There are no midges.

I appreciate that this particular thing is only relevant to people like me who have sweet itch sufferers. Sorry to everyone else but you folks have 8 other months of the year for your horse to enjoy the sunshine, wear no rug and not spend a King’s Ransom on sweet itch rugs and products.

I spend those 8 months feeling guilty, crying, worrying about her, putting lotions and creams on her, stopping her from harming herself on every surface she comes into contact, hating the fact she can never be turned out without a rug and feel the sun on her back, cancelling dates for pony parties because she can’t get too hot or be trusted in a trailer, googling salt therapy, immunotherapy and reading every book, article and blog post about advances in veterinary medicine which may possibly go some way to making her life more bearable.